My kid came home yesterday from school and wanted me to email his teacher. This particular child is known to bring to the attention of any adult the rule-breaking behavior of siblings, friends and even parents. He is a rule follower and doesn’t appreciate when others are crossing those lines.
I cautiously inquired as to the reason for needing to email his teacher, and well, to be honest, this is a parenting moment where I am just not sure what the right answer is. So, I’m crowdsourcing…
Each day the kids pack their own lunches. My youngest would love to buy lunch at her preschool, but four weeks into the year I haven’t cracked that nut and it is way easier to just slap a peanut butter and jelly together rather than trying to figure out how much I pay, to what technology platform and by when in order for her to buy lunch.
Well, apparently a trend has started in my son’s lunch period and he and I are both stuck as to what the right answer is.
The Gum Lesson
This really all goes back to my childhood and a very clear lesson I learned in middle school from my father. I was with my dad once when another child asked me if I could share a piece of gum. I lied to the other kid and said I didn’t have anymore. My dad knew full well that I had a pack as he had just seen me take it out and pop a piece in my mouth. Now, you must understand that my dad does not (and did not) tolerate lying or dishonesty. I will forever be grateful for his extreme emphasis on truth-telling across the board.
He looked down at me and said, “Lesley you should always share if you have some. If you promise to share a piece whenever you have it, I will always make sure you have gum to share.”
He and I both stood true to our promise that day and in high school, I ended up with a reputation as the girl that always had gum if you needed it. My dad for his part would go to Sam’s Club each week and by me the large packets of my favorites.
This experience and my deep faith fed into my preference for generosity over hoarding. So, when my 
son comes to me and tells me that a child at lunch keeps asking him for his chips and candy, my initial reaction is “let’s add more to your lunch box so you have enough to share.”
In the Trash
But here is where it gets complicated. The child is receiving lunches from the school. Neither my son nor I know if those are free state-provided lunches, or if he buys because that’s what his parents prefer. Either way, once he has gone through the line with his lunch, he dumps most of it in the trash can and begins asking the other boys at the table for their food.
Now, this story is as old as time and there are many movies that depict a school bully beating up another kid for his lunch. But what if we aren’t talking about a bully, and instead we are talking about generosity. Our family is not quite in the position to be providing extra lunches to other kids at school these days either.
This morning as he was packing his lunch, I asked my son if he had put enough in to share with the other kid. He responded, “Yes, I did, and I have another extra Starburst to trade with my friend who is giving me two rabbit skins.” After my eyes bulge out of my head, I realize these rabbit pelts are virtual and will be handed over inside of Fortnite.
So, there you have it, friends… there are just too many life lessons rolled up into school lunches. What would you do?
